var quotes=new Array()
//change the quotes if desired. Add/ delete additional quotes as desired.
quotes[0]='The current research model sucks and there needs to be a new one.
Software Vendor, VP Corporate Development'
quotes[1]='It’s a funny thing about life; if you refuse to accept anything but the best, you very often get it. —W. Somerset Maugham'
quotes[2]='It would appear that we have reached the limits of what it is possible to achieve with computer technology, although one should be careful with such statements, as they tend to sound pretty silly in 5 years. —John Von Neumann, Fermi Award winning Mathematician, ca. 1949'
quotes[3]='Nothing we learn in this world is ever wasted. —Eleanor Roosevelt'
quotes[4]='I am an idealist.
I don\'t know where I\'m going but I\'m on my way. —Carl Sandburg'
quotes[5]='I am a great believer in luck, and I find the harder I work the more I have of it. —Thomas Jefferson, US President (1743 - 1826'
quotes[6]='The freedom which we enjoy in our government extends also to our ordinary life. There, far from exercising a jealous surveillance over each other, we do not feel called upon to be angry with our neighbor for doing what he likes. —Pericles, 431 B.C.'
quotes[7]='Microsoft has had competitors in the past. It\'s a good thing we have museums to document this stuff. —Microsoft Chairman Bill Gates'
quotes[8]='People who say it cannot be done should not interrupt those of us who are doing it. —Anonymous'
quotes[9]='There are 10 types of people in the world: those who understand binary, and those who don\'t... —Anonymous'
quotes[10]='French Bread security*, while better than none, is risky.
*hard on the outside, soft on the inside —John Hardin'
quotes[11]='Our doubts are traitors,
And make us lose the good we oft might win
By fearing to attempt. —William Shakespeare'
quotes[12]='You can\'t depend on your judgement when your imagination is out of focus. —Mark Twain'
quotes[13]='I have never in my life learned anything from any man who agreed with me. —Dudley Field Malone'
quotes[14]='To announce that there must be no criticism of the President, or that we are to stand by the President, right or wrong, is not only unpatriotic and servile, but is morally treasonable to the American public. —Theodore Roosevelt'
quotes[15]='In my own private concerns with mankind, I have observed that to kick a little when under imposition has a good effect. A little sturdiness when superiors are much in the wrong sometimes occasions consideration. —Benjamin Franklin'
quotes[16]='Any girl can be glamorous. All she has to do is stand still and look stupid. —Hedy Lamarr, co-inventor of radio frequency hopping technology and Hollywood star '
quotes[17]='Patience and perseverance have a magical effect before which difficulties disappear and obstacles vanish. —John Quincy Adams'
quotes[18]='Imagination is more important than knowledge. —Albert Einstein'
quotes[19]='Anything one man can imagine, other men can make real. —Jules Vernes'
quotes[20]='The only way to discover the limits of the possible is to go beyond them into the impossible. —Clarke\'s Second law'
quotes[21]='You do not really understand something unless you can explain it to your grandmother. —Albert Einstein'
quotes[22]='Anyone who conducts an argument by appealing to authority is not using his intelligence; he is just using his memory. —Leonardo Da Vinci'
quotes[23]='History suggests that capitalism is a necessary condition for political freedom. Clearly it is not a sufficient condition. —Milton Friedman, Capitalism and Freedom, 1962.'
quotes[24]='The illiterate of the 21st century will not be those who cannot read and write, but those who cannot learn, unlearn, and relearn.
Alvin Toffler'
quotes[25]='You can tell whether a man is clever by his answers. You can tell whether a man is wise by his questions. —Naguib Mahfouz '
quotes[26]='Goodness defeated is stronger than evil triumphant. —Martin Luther King, Jr.'
quotes[27]='A tyrant...is always stirring up some war or other, in order that the people may require a leader. —Plato'
quotes[28]='If one does not know to which port one is sailing, no wind is favorable. '
quotes[29]='If a man knows not what harbor he seeks, any wind is the right wind. '
quotes[30]='Luck is what happens when preparation meets opportunity.
Seneca, Roman philosopher, mid-first century AD.'
quotes[31]='They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety. —Ben Franklin, ~1784'
quotes[32]='Photons have neither morals or visas —Dave Farber 1996'
quotes[33]='A revolution is not a dinner party. —Mao Tse Tung '
quotes[34]='Make no little plans — they have no magic to stir men\'s blood. Make big plans; aim high in hope and work. —Daniel H. Burnham'
quotes[35]='To understand recursion, we must first understand recursion. —Tina Mancuso'
quotes[36]='As Alan Kay once said, It\'s easier to invent the future than it is to predict it.'
quotes[37]='An invasion of armies can be resisted, but not an idea whose time has come. —Victor Hugo'
quotes[38]='If you can look into the seeds of time and say which grain will grow, and which will not, speak then to me. —Shakespeare, Macbeth'
quotes[39]='Man is still the most extraordinary computer of all. —John F. Kennedy'
quotes[40]='The real queston is not whether machines think, but whether men do. —B.F. Skinner'
quotes[41]='We want to replace the computer metaphor with the brain metaphor. —David Rumelhart'
quotes[42]='It is a capital mistake to theorize before one has data. —Sir Arthur Conan Doyle'
quotes[43]='A learning machine is any device whose actions are influenced by past experience. —Nils Nilsson '
quotes[44]='The future of computing will be 100% driven by delegating to, rather than manipulating, computers. —Nicholas Negroponte'
quotes[45]='Everything is worth what its purchaser will pay for it. —Publilius Syrus'
quotes[46]='When you\'ve got them by their wallets, their hearts and minds will follow. —Fern Nait'
quotes[47]='First get your facts, then you can distort them at your leisure —Mark Twain '
quotes[48]='Golf is an endless series of tragedies obscured by the occasional miracle —Sports Illustrated '
quotes[49]='If A equals success, then the formula is A equals X plus Y plus Z. X is work. Y is play. Z is keep your mouth shut. —Albert Einstein '
quotes[50]='To improve is to change. To be perfect is to change often. —Winston Churchill'
quotes[51]='I feel sorry for people who don’t drink. When they wake up in the morning, that’s as good as they’re going to feel all day. —Frank Sinatra'
quotes[52]='If the world really looks like that I will paint no more! —Claude Monet, flinging away a pair of glasses for which he had been fitted to correct a severe astigmatism.'
quotes[53]='You have to accept whatever comes, and the only important thing is that you meet it with the best you have to give. —Eleanor Roosevelt'
quotes[54]='More than at any time in history mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness, the other to total extinction. Let us pray that we have the wisdom to choose correctly. —Woody Allen '
quotes[55]='If you don\'t know where you are going, you will probably end up somewhere else. —Lawrence J. Peter'
quotes[56]='The only way of discovering the limits of the possible is to venture a little way past them into the impossible. —Arthur C. Clarke'
quotes[57]='Time spent laughing is time spent with the gods. —Japanese Proverb'
quotes[58]='Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day; teach him to use the Net and he won\'t bother you for weeks. —Anonymous'
quotes[59]='The Internet is crap. —Christos M. Cotsakos, Chairman & CEO, E*TRADE Group, Inc., at FMI, May, 1995 (while ACNielsen CEO)'
quotes[60]='Let him that would move the world first move himself. —Socrates'
quotes[61]='Every year, back comes Spring, with nasty little birds yapping their fool heads off and the ground all mucked up with plants. —Dorothy Parker'
quotes[62]='No crisis inside a computer is worth humiliating a human. —Cooper Interaction Design'
quotes[63]='Alternative Windows error message:
Chaos reigns within.
Reflect, repent, and reboot.
Order shall return.'
quotes[64]='Alternative Windows error message: A file that big?
It might be very useful.
But now it is gone'
quotes[65]='Alternative Windows error message:
The Web site you seek
Can not be located but
Countless more exist'
quotes[66]='Alternative Windows error message:
ABORTED effort:
Close all that you have worked on.
You ask way too much.'
quotes[67]='Alternative Windows error message:
Yesterday it worked
Today it is not working
Windows is like that.'
quotes[68]='Alternative Windows error message:
Windows XP crashed.
I am the Blue Screen of Death.
No one hears your screams.'
quotes[69]='Alternative Windows error message:
Stay the patient course
Of little worth is your ire
The network is down'
quotes[70]='Alternative Windows error message: Out of memory.
We wish to hold the whole sky,
But we never will.'
quotes[71]='There is nothing more permanent than a temporary solution...'
quotes[72]='You can\'t create a foolproof machine because fools are so clever. —Jaron Lanier, Virtual Reality pioneer'
quotes[73]='The fact that your voice is amplified to the degree where it reaches from one end of the country to the other does not confer upon you greater wisdom or understanding than you possessed when your voice reached only from one end of the bar to the other.
—Edward R Murrow CBS reporter, 1965'
quotes[74]='The only test of leadership is that somebody follows. —Robert K. Greenleaf'
quotes[75]='Dreams are answers to questions we havn\'t figured out how to ask yet. —Unknown'
quotes[76]='You must unlearn what you have learned. —Yoda, Jedi Master'
quotes[77]='Have you ever noticed? Anybody going slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a moron. —George Carlin'
quotes[78]='Life is what happens while you\'re busy making other plans. —John Lennon'
quotes[79]='Do not expect to be applauded when you do the right thing, and do not expect to be forgiven when you err. But even your enemies will respect commitment — and a conscience at peace is worth more than a thousand tainted victories. —Michael P. Kube-McDowell'
quotes[80]='Even if you are on the right track, you\'ll get run over if you just sit there. —Will Rogers'
quotes[81]='I am easily satisfied with the very best. —Sir Winston Churchill'
quotes[82]='Anytime you think the problem is out there, that very thought is the problem. —Stephen R. Covey'
quotes[83]='The journey of a thousand miles begins with a full tank of gas. —Unknown'
quotes[84]='Experience is that marvelous thing that enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again. —F. P. Jones'
quotes[85]='A man is free in relation to the number of things he can afford to let alone. —Henry David Thoreau'
quotes[86]='True benefactors seek a noble result, not the glory of creating that result themselves. —Timothy Zahn'
quotes[87]='Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so. —Douglas Adams'
quotes[88]='Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning. —Rich Cook'
quotes[89]='Only two things are infinite, the Universe and human stupidity, and I\'m not sure about the former. —Albert Einstein'
quotes[90]='The unexamined life is not worth living. —Socrates '
quotes[91]='... But the too carefully examined life doesn\'t get lived at all. —Peter Egan'
quotes[92]='Whether you think you\'ll win or lose, you\'re right. —Henry Ford'
quotes[93]='Try not. Do, or do not. There is no try. —Yoda, Jedi Master'
quotes[94]='A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized. —Fred Allen'
quotes[95]='Actions lie louder than words. —Carolyn Wells'
quotes[96]='Whenever you find that you are on the side of the majority, it is time to reform. —Mark Twain'
quotes[97]='Never judge a book by its movie. —J. W. Eagan'
quotes[98]='I can resist everything except temptation. —Oscar Wilde'
quotes[99]='I am not young enough to know everything. —Oscar Wilde'
quotes[100]='Hindsight is always twenty-twenty. —Billy Wilder'
quotes[101]='We can\'t all be heroes because somebody has to sit on the curb and clap as they go by. —Will Rogers'
quotes[102]='The best way to predict the future is to invent it. —Alan Kay'
quotes[103]='Discovery consists of seeing what everybody has seen and thinking what nobody has thought. —Albert von Szent-Gyorgyi'
quotes[104]='The report of my death was an exaggeration. —Mark Twain'
quotes[105]='You can pretend to be serious; you can\'t pretend to be witty. —Sacha Guitry'
quotes[106]='Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we didn\'t. —Erica Jong'
quotes[107]='It is easier to fight for one\'s principles than to live up to them. —Alfred Adler'
quotes[108]='The best way to keep one\'s word is not to give it. —Napoleon Bonaparte'
quotes[109]='Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act. —Truman Capote'
quotes[110]='Education is what survives when what has been learned has been forgotten —B.F. Skinner'
quotes[111]='It is far more impressive when others discover your good qualities without your help. —Miss Manners (Judith Martin'
quotes[112]='If you cannot convince them, confuse them —Harry S. Truman'
quotes[113]='A fanatic is one who can\'t change his mind and won\'t change the subject. —Winston Churchill'
quotes[114]='When ideas fail, words come in very handy. —Goethe'
quotes[115]='When a man says he approves of something in principle, it means he hasn\'t the slightest intention of putting it into practice. —Bismarck'
quotes[116]='It is not necessary to understand things in order to argue about them. —Caron de Beaumarchais'
quotes[117]='Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please. —Mark Twain'
quotes[118]='Where facts are few, experts are many. —Donald R. Gannon'
quotes[119]='There is only one thing a philosopher can be relied upon to do, and that is to contradict other philosophers. —William James'
quotes[120]='Most human beings have an almost infinite capacity for taking things for granted. —Aldous Huxley'
quotes[121]='Nothing is said that has not been said before. —Terence (185-159 B.C.'
quotes[122]='Good judgment comes from experience, and experience comes from bad judgment. —Barry LePatner'
quotes[123]='Either I\'ve been missing something or nothing has been going on. —Karen Elizabeth Gordon'
quotes[124]='Advertisements contain the only truths to be relied on in a newspaper. —Mark Twain'
quotes[125]='After all is said and done, a lot more will be said than done. —Unknown'
quotes[126]='If your parents never had children, chances are you won\'t, either. —Dick Cavett'
quotes[127]='Lack of money is no obstacle. Lack of an idea is an obstacle. —Ken Hakuta'
quotes[128]='What is written without effort is in general read without pleasure. —Samuel Johnson'
quotes[129]='Good advice is something a man gives when he is too old to set a bad example. —La Rouchefoucauld'
quotes[130]='All of us learn to write in the second grade. Most of us go on to greater things. —Bobby Knight'
quotes[131]='You can\'t build a reputation on what you are going to do. —Henry Ford'
quotes[132]='Don\'t tell people how to do things. Tell them what to do and let them surprise you with their results. —George Patton'
quotes[133]='The important thing is not to stop questioning. —Albert Einstein'
quotes[134]='There are two kinds of people, those who finish what they start and so on. —Robert Byrne'
quotes[135]='Never believe anything until it has been officially denied. —Claud Cockburn'
quotes[136]='Life is something that everyone should try at least once. —Henry J. Tillman'
quotes[137]='Always do right. This will gratify some people and astonish the rest. —Mark Twain'
quotes[138]='Fashion is a form of ugliness so intolerable that we have to alter it every six months. —Oscar Wilde'
quotes[139]='Just because something doesn\'t do what you planned it to do doesn\'t mean it\'s useless. —Thomas Alva Edison'
quotes[140]='Of those who say nothing, few are silent. —Thomas Neill'
quotes[141]='Meetings are indispensable when you don\'t want to do anything. —John Kenneth Galbraith'
quotes[142]='Education is the ability to listen to almost anything without losing your temper. —Robert Frost'
quotes[143]='Early to bed and early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy, and wise. —Benjamin Franklin'
quotes[144]='I was walking down the street wearing glasses when the prescription ran out. —Steven Wright'
quotes[145]='You know why birds run? Because they\'re not in a hurry. —Steven Wright'
quotes[146]='It has been my experience that folks who have no vices have very few virtues. —Abraham Lincoln'
quotes[147]='Old age is not so bad when you consider the alternatives. —Maurice Chevalier'
quotes[148]='Human beings are the only creatures that allow their children to come back home. —Bill Cosby'
quotes[149]='Blessed is he who expects nothing, for he shall never be disappointed. —Jonathan Swift'
quotes[150]='Drawing on my fine command of the English language, I said nothing. —Robert Benchley'
quotes[151]='It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it. —Aristotle'
quotes[152]='The purpose of life is to fight maturity. —Dick Werthimer'
quotes[153]='History is the version of past events that people have decided to agree upon. —Napoleon Bonaparte'
quotes[154]='Fortune does not change men, it unmasks them. —Suzanne Necker'
quotes[155]='Whenever people agree with me I always feel I must be wrong. —Oscar Wilde'
quotes[156]='Knowledge is power. —Unknown'
quotes[157]='Remember that time is money. —Unknown'
quotes[158]='Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities. Truth isn\'t. —Mark Twain'
quotes[159]='A witty saying proves nothing. —Voltaire'
quotes[160]='The basis for optimism is sheer terror. —Oscar Wilde'
quotes[161]='The right to be heard does not automatically include the right to be taken seriously. —Hubert Humphrey'
quotes[162]='Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow. —Mark Twain'
quotes[163]='Happiness isn\'t something you experience; it\'s something you remember. —Oscar Levant'
quotes[164]='It is bad luck to be superstitious. —Andrew W. Mathis'
quotes[165]='If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee. —Abraham Lincoln'
quotes[166]='Honest disagreement is often a good sign of progress. —Gandhi'
quotes[167]='The most wasted of all days is one without laughter. —e. e. cummings'
quotes[168]='A little inaccuracy sometimes saves tons of explanation. —H. H. Munro (Saki'
quotes[169]='When people are free to do as they please, they usually imitate each other. —Eric Hoffer'
quotes[170]='I bought some batteries, but they weren\'t included. —Steven Wright'
quotes[171]='A Hospital is no place to be sick. —Samuel Goldwyn'
quotes[172]='Strange as it may seem, my life is based on a true story .
—Ashleigh Brilliant'
quotes[173]='Save a little money each month and at the end of the year you\'ll be surprised at how little you have. —Ernest Haskins'
quotes[174]='Man is the Only Animal that Blushes. Or needs to. —Mark Twain'
quotes[175]='My sources are unreliable, but their information is fascinating. —Ashleigh Brilliant'
quotes[176]='We should distrust any enterprise that requires new clothes. —Henry David Thoreau'
quotes[177]='An author is a fool who, not content with boring those he lives with, insists on boring future generations. —Charles de Montesquieu'
quotes[178]='The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds; and the pessimist fears this is true. —Irving Caesar'
quotes[179]='Life is something that happens when you can\'t get to sleep. —Fran Lebowitz'
quotes[180]='If we don\'t change direction soon, we\'ll end up where we\'re going. —Professor Irwin Corey'
quotes[181]='A conference is a gathering of important people who singly can do nothing, but together can decide that nothing can be done. —Fred Allen'
quotes[182]='A billion here, a billion there, pretty soon it adds up to real money. —Senator Everett Dirksen'
quotes[183]='You can\'t shake hands with a clenched fist. —Indira Gandhi'
quotes[184]='Never let your sense of morals get in the way of doing what\'s right. —Isaac Asimov'
quotes[185]='Everything is funny as long as it is happening to Somebody Else. —Will Rogers'
quotes[186]='Most people would like to be delivered from temptation but would like it to keep in touch. —Robert Orben'
quotes[187]='Food is an important part of a balanced diet. —Fran Lebowitz'
quotes[188]='Never confuse motion with action. —Ben Franklin'
quotes[189]='A free society is a place where it\'s safe to be unpopular. —Adlai Stevenson'
quotes[190]='In these matters the only certainty is that nothing is certain. —Pliny the Elder'
quotes[191]='I\'ve been on a diet for two weeks and all I\'ve lost is two weeks. —Totie Fields'
quotes[192]='I have never taken any exercise except sleeping and resting. —Mark Twain'
quotes[193]='Thanks to the Interstate Highway System, it is now possible to travel from coast to coast without seeing anything. —Charles Kuralt'
quotes[194]='The difference between literature and journalism is that journalism is unreadable and literature is not read. —Oscar Wilde'
quotes[195]='He\'s the kind of a guy who lights up a room just by flicking a switch. —Unknown'
quotes[196]='Imagination is the one weapon in the war against reality. —Jules de Gaultier'
quotes[197]='The pure and simple truth is rarely pure and never simple. —Oscar Wilde'
quotes[198]='Nostalgia isn\'t what it used to be. —Anonymous'
quotes[199]='I can\'t understand why people are frightened of new ideas. I\'m frightened of the old ones. —John Cage'
quotes[200]='A synonym is a word you use when you can\'t spell the word you first thought of. —Burt Bacharach'
quotes[201]='Life is what happens while you are making other plans —John Lennon'
quotes[202]='Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man\'s character, give him power. —Abraham Lincoln'
quotes[203]='Instant gratification takes too long. —Carrie Fisher'
quotes[204]='Isn\'t it interesting that the same people who laugh at science fiction listen to weather forecasts and economists? —Kelvin Throop, III'
quotes[205]='A bore is a man who, when you ask him how he is, tells you. —Bert Leston Taylor'
quotes[206]='An expert is a person who has made all the mistakes that can be made in a very narrow field. —Niels Bohr'
quotes[207]='He hasn\'t an enemy in the world — but all his friends hate him. —Eddie Cantor'
quotes[208]='Hollywood is a place where they place you under contract instead of under observation. —Walter Winchell'
quotes[209]='In archaeology you uncover the unknown. In diplomacy you cover the known. —Thomas Pickering'
quotes[210]='Believe those who are seeking the truth. Doubt those who find it. —Andre Gide'
quotes[211]='We must believe in luck. For how else can we explain the success of those we don\'t like? —Jean Cocteau'
quotes[212]='Everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects. —Will Rogers'
quotes[213]='If I have seen farther than others, it is because I was standing on the shoulders of giants. —Isaac Newton'
quotes[214]='A verbal contract isn\'t worth the paper it\'s written on. —Goldwyn\'s Law of Contracts'
quotes[215]='There never was a good war or a bad peace. —Benjamin Franklin'
quotes[216]='If one sticks too rigidly to one\'s principles, one would hardly see anybody. —Agatha Christie'
quotes[217]='Every nation ridicules other nations, and all are right. —Arthur Schopenhauer'
quotes[218]='Research is the process of going up alleys to see if they are blind. —Marston Bates'
quotes[219]='It is easier to forgive an enemy than to forgive a friend. —William Blake'
quotes[220]='If you tell the truth you don\'t have to remember anything. —Mark Twain'
quotes[221]='Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society. —Mark Twain'
quotes[222]='Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever. —Napoleon Bonaparte'
quotes[223]='I would never die for my beliefs because I might be wrong. —Bertrand Russell'
quotes[224]='Nothing is impossible for the man who doesn\'t have to do it himself. —A. H. Weiler'
quotes[225]='Life is a long lesson in humility. —James M. Barrie'
quotes[226]='Speak the truth, but leave immediately after. —Slovenian Proverb'
quotes[227]='Honesty is the best policy — when there is money in it. —Mark Twain'
quotes[228]='When dealing with the insane, the best method is to pretend to be sane. —Hermann Hesse'
quotes[229]='The human race has one really effective weapon, and that is laughter. —Mark Twain'
quotes[230]='Talk sense to a fool and he calls you foolish. —Euripides'
quotes[231]='Few things are harder to put up with than the annoyance of a good example. —Mark Twain'
quotes[232]='The only thing worse than a man you can\'t control is a man you can. —Margo Kaufman'
quotes[233]='I love acting. It is so much more real than life. —Oscar Wilde'
quotes[234]='The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in the mind at the same time, and still retain the ability to function. —F. Scott Fitzgerald'
quotes[235]='To invent, you need a good imagination and a pile of junk. —Thomas Alva Edison'
quotes[236]='A good listener is usually thinking about something else. —Kin Hubbard'
quotes[237]='I don\'t want to belong to any club that will accept me as a member. —Groucho Marx'
quotes[238]='A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don\'t need it. —Bob Hope'
quotes[239]='Boys will be boys, and so will a lot of middle-aged men. —Kin Hubbard'
quotes[240]='If you can find something everyone agrees on, it\'s wrong. —Mo Udall'
quotes[241]='As far as the laws of mathematics refer to reality, they are not certain; and as far as they are certain, they do not refer to reality. —Albert Einstein'
quotes[242]='Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the universe together.... —Carl Zwanzig'
quotes[243]='Horse sense is the thing a horse has which keeps it from betting on people. —W.C. Fields'
quotes[244]='I always wanted to be somebody, but I should have been more specific. —Lily Tomlin and Jane Wagner'
quotes[245]='If all the cars in the United States were placed end to end, it would probably be Labor Day Weekend. —Doug Larson'
quotes[246]='Art is making something out of nothing and selling it. —Frank Zappa'
quotes[247]='Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana. —Lisa Grossman'
quotes[248]='Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons. —Woody Allen'
quotes[249]='Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life. —Herbert Henry Asquith'
quotes[250]='One reason why I don\'t drink is because I wish to know when I am having a good time. —Nancy Astor'
quotes[251]='I take the view, and always have, that if you cannot say what you are going to say in twenty minutes you ought to go away and write a book about it. —Lord Brabazon'
quotes[252]='I am prepared to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter. —Winston Churchill'
quotes[253]='Every day, in every way, I am getting better and better. —Emile Coue'
quotes[254]='Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them. —Joseph Heller, Catch-22'
quotes[255]='Cynicism is an unpleasant way of saying the truth. —Lillian Hellman'
quotes[256]='It is impossible to enjoy idling thoroughly unless one has plenty of work to do. —Jerome K. Jerome'
quotes[257]='Competence, like truth, beauty and contact lenses, is in the eye of the beholder. —Dr. Laurence Peter and Raymond Hull'
quotes[258]='No one can make you feel inferior without your consent. —Eleanor Roosevelt'
quotes[259]='The young have aspirations that never come to pass, the old have reminiscences of what never happened. —Saki (Hector Hugh Munro'
quotes[260]='Famous remarks are very seldom quoted correctly. —Simeon Strunsky'
quotes[261]='A child becomes an adult when he realizes that he has a right not only to be right but also to be wrong. —Thomas Szasz'
quotes[262]='A compromise is the art of dividing a cake in such a way that everyone believes he has the biggest piece. —Ludwig Erhard'
quotes[263]='A country can be judged by the quality of its proverbs. —German Proverb'
quotes[264]='A good novel tells us the truth about its hero; but a bad novel tells us the truth about its author. —G. K. Chesterton '
quotes[265]='A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable, but more useful than a life spent doing nothing. —George Bernard Shaw'
quotes[266]='A man cannot be too careful in the choice of his enemies. —Oscar Wilde'
quotes[267]='A man with a watch knows what time it is. A man with two watches is never sure. —Segal\'s Law'
quotes[268]='A rumor without a leg to stand on will get around some other way. —John Tudor'
quotes[269]='A wise man can see more from the bottom of a well than a fool can from a mountain top . —Unknown'
quotes[270]='All generalizations are dangerous, even this one. —Alexandre Dumas'
quotes[271]='All the world\'s a stage and most of us are desperately unrehearsed. —Sean O\'Casey'
quotes[272]='Always be nice to those younger than you, because they are the ones who will be writing about you. —Cyril Connolly'
quotes[273]='An effective way to deal with predators is to taste terrible. —Unknown'
quotes[274]='An idealist is one who, on noticing that roses smell better than a cabbage, concludes that it will also make better soup. —H. L. Mencken'
quotes[275]='An undefined problem has an infinite number of solutions. —Robert A. Humphrey'
quotes[276]='Any fool can tell the truth, but it requires a man of some sense to know how to lie well. —Samuel Butler'
quotes[277]='Anyone who uses the phrase \'easy as taking candy from a baby\' has never tried taking candy from a baby. —Unknown'
quotes[278]='Astronomers say the universe is finite, which is a comforting thought for those people who can\'t remember where they leave things. —Unknown'
quotes[279]='At my lemonade stand I used to give the first glass away free and charge five dollars for the second glass. The refill contained the antidote. —Emo Philips'
quotes[280]='Cigarette smoking is a major cause of statistics. —Message in fortune cookie'
quotes[281]='Computers can figure out all kinds of problems, except the things in the world that just don\'t add up. —James Magary'
quotes[282]='Conscience is the inner voice that warns us that someone might be looking. —H. L. Mencken '
quotes[283]='Don\'t go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first. —Mark Twain'
quotes[284]='Don\'t worry about the world coming to an end today. It\'s already tomorrow in Australia. —Charles Schultz'
quotes[285]='Eternity is a mere moment, just long enough for a joke. —Hermann Hesse'
quotes[286]='Everyone is born with genius, but most people only keep it a few minutes. —Edgard Varese'
quotes[287]='Fools rush in where fools have been before. —Unknown'
quotes[288]='Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate. —Thomas Jones'
quotes[289]='Good breeding consists of concealing how much we think of ourselves and how little we think of the other person. —Mark Twain'
quotes[290]='He who hesitates is not only lost, but miles from the next exit. —Unknown'
quotes[291]='History teaches us that men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all other alternatives. —Abba Eban'
quotes[292]='I don\'t think anyone should write their autobiography until after they\'re dead. —Samuel Goldwyn'
quotes[293]='I don\'t necessarily agree with everything I say. —Marshall McLuhan'
quotes[294]='I have never met a man so ignorant that I couldn\'t learn something from him. —Galileo Galilei'
quotes[295]='I never think of the future — it comes soon enough. —Albert Einstein'
quotes[296]='I never put on a pair of shoes until I\'ve worn them at least five years. —Samuel Goldwyn'
quotes[297]='I used to work in a fire hydrant factory. You couldn\'t park anywhere near the place. —Steven Wright'
quotes[298]='If God had really intended men to fly, he\'d make it easier to get to the airport. —George Winters'
quotes[299]='If I had to live my life again, I\'d make the same mistakes, only sooner. —Tallulah Bankhead'
quotes[300]='If two men agree on everything, you may be sure that one of them is doing the thinking. —Lyndon Baines Johnson'
quotes[301]='If we don\'t succeed, we run the risk of failure. —J. Danforth Quayle'
quotes[302]='If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man. —Mark Twain '
quotes[303]='In answer to the question of why it happened, I offer the modest proposal that our Universe is simply one of those things which happen from time to time. —Edward P. Tryon'
quotes[304]='Income tax returns are the most imaginative fiction being written today. —Herman Wouk'
quotes[305]='It is a good thing for an uneducated man to read books of quotations. —Winston Churchill'
quotes[306]='It is amazing what you can accomplish if you do not care who gets the credit. —Harry S. Truman'
quotes[307]='It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt. —Mark Twain'
quotes[308]='It is only possible to live happily ever after on a day-to-day basis. —Margaret Bonnano'
quotes[309]='It is possible to store the mind with a million facts and still be entirely uneducated. —Alec Bourne'
quotes[310]='It is well to remember that the entire universe, with one trifling exception, is composed of others. —John Andrew Holmes'
quotes[311]='It usually takes more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech. —Mark Twain'
quotes[312]='I\'m an idealist. I don\'t know where I\'m going, but I\'m on my way. —Carl Sandburg'
quotes[313]='I\'ve been trying for some time to develop a lifestyle that doesn\'t require my presence. —Gary Trudeau'
quotes[314]='Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards. —Soren Kierkegaard'
quotes[315]='Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain. —Lily Tomlin'
quotes[316]='Men occasionally stumble over the truth, but most of them pick themselves up and hurry off as if nothing ever happened. —Winston Churchill'
quotes[317]='Never eat more than you can lift. —Miss Piggy'
quotes[318]='People who have what they want are fond of telling people who haven\'t what they want that they really don\'t want it. —Ogden Nash'
quotes[319]='Reason has always existed, but not always in a reasonable form. —Karl Marx'
quotes[320]='Space isn\'t remote at all. It\'s only an hour\'s drive away if your car could go straight upwards. —Fred Hoyle'
quotes[321]='Tact is the ability to describe others as they see themselves. —Abraham Lincoln '
quotes[322]='The best measure of a man\'s honesty isn\'t his income tax return. It\'s the zero adjust on his bathroom scale. —Arthur C. Clarke'
quotes[323]='The cure for boredom is curiosity. There is no cure for curiosity. —Ellen Parr'
quotes[324]='The future is much like the present, only longer. —Don Quisenberry'
quotes[325]='The intelligent man finds almost everything ridiculous, the sensible man hardly anything. —Goethe'
quotes[326]='The most incomprehensible thing about the world is that it is at all comprehensible. —Albert Einstein '
quotes[327]='The opposite of a correct statement is a false statement. But the opposite of a profound truth may well be another profound truth. —Niels Bohr'
quotes[328]='The problem with any unwritten law is that you don\'t know where to go to erase it. —Glaser and Way'
quotes[329]='The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you\'re still a rat. —Lily Tomlin'
quotes[330]='There are two kinds of people in the world, those who believe there are two kinds of people in the world and those who don\'t. —Benchley\'s Law of Distinction'
quotes[331]='There\'s no point in being grown up if you can\'t be childish sometimes. —Dr. Who'
quotes[332]='You can observe a lot by just watching. —Berra\'s Law'
quotes[333]='Time is that quality of nature which keeps events from happening all at once. Lately it doesn\'t seem to be working. —Anonymous'
quotes[334]='It is better to know some of the questions than all of the answers. —James Thurber'
quotes[335]='Only the mediocre are always at their best. —Jean Giraudoux'
quotes[336]='It is better to have loved and lost than never to have lost at all. —Samuel Butler'
quotes[337]='The reverse side also has a reverse side. —Japanese proverb'
quotes[338]='The man who doesn\'t read good books has no advantage over the man who can\'t read them. —Mark Twain'
quotes[339]='It is easier to stay out than get out. —Mark Twain'
quotes[340]='There are more of them than us. —Herb Caen'
quotes[341]='Honest criticism is hard to take, particularly from a relative, a friend, an acquaintance, or a stranger. —Franklin P. Jones'
quotes[342]='Middle age is when you\'ve met so many people that every new person you meet reminds you of someone else. —Ogden Nash'
quotes[343]='Charm is a way of getting the answer yes without asking a clear question. —Albert Camus'
quotes[344]='The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore all progress depends on the unreasonable man. —George Bernard Shaw'
quotes[345]='If the facts don\'t fit the theory, change the facts. —Albert Einstein'
quotes[346]='An ignorant person is one who doesn\'t know what you have just found out. —Will Rogers'
quotes[347]='Eternal nothingness is fine if you happen to be dressed for it. —Woody Allen'
quotes[348]='Given a choice between two theories, take the one which is funnier. —Blore\'s Razor'
quotes[349]='My life has a superb cast but I can\'t figure out the plot. —Ashleigh Brilliant'
quotes[350]='I don\'t have any solution, but I certainly admire the problem. —Ashleigh Brilliant'
quotes[351]='The only way to discover the limits of the possible is to go beyond them into the impossible. —Arthur C. Clarke, Technology and the Future'
quotes[352]='Do not condemn the judgement of another because it differs from your own. You may both be wrong. —Dandemis'
quotes[353]='Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn\'t go away. —Philip K. Dick'
quotes[354]='Efficiency is intelligent laziness. —David Dunham'
quotes[355]='If all else fails, immortality can always be assured by spectacular error. —John Kenneth Galbraith'
quotes[356]='If you believe everything you read, better not read. —Japanese proverb'
quotes[357]='Experience is that marvelous thing that enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again. —F. P. Jones'
quotes[358]='If the only tool you have is a hammer, you tend to see every problem as a nail. —Abraham Maslow'
quotes[359]='Talking much about oneself can also be a means to conceal oneself. —Friedrich Nietzsche'
quotes[360]='I am not in this world to live up to other people\'s expectations, nor do I feel that the world must live up to mine. —Fritz Perls'
quotes[361]='In theory, there is no difference between theory and practice; in practice, there is. —Chuck Reid'
quotes[362]='The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it. —George Bernard Shaw'
quotes[363]='I can\'t complain, but sometimes I still do. —Joe Walsh'
quotes[364]='Furious activity is no substitute for understanding. —H. H. Williams'
quotes[365]='A superstition is a premature explanation that overstays its time. —George Iles'
quotes[366]='You can\'t depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus. —Mark Twain'
quotes[367]='One doesn\'t have a sense of humor. It has you. —Larry Gelbart'
quotes[368]='First things first, but not necessarily in that order. —Doctor Who'
quotes[369]='An expert is just some jerk from out of town. —Mike Ellsworth'
quotes[370]='We will receive not what we idly wish for but what we justly earn. Our rewards will always be in exact proportion to the number of people we help and the quality of our service to them. —Earl Nightingale'
quotes[371]='Democracy must be something more than two wolves and a sheep voting on what to have for dinner. — James Bovard, Attention Deficit Democracy, 2006'
quotes[372]='We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence is therefore not an act, but a habit. — Aristotle'
quotes[373]='The entrepreneur that thoroughly understands how to run a single company can run multiple companies at the same time. —J.P. Getty'
quotes[374]='Things may come to those who wait, but only the things left by those who hustle. —Abraham Lincoln'
quotes[375]='Computers are useless. They can only give you answers. —Pablo Picasso '
quotes[376]='The past should be a springboard, not a hammock. —Anonymous'
quotes[377]='Half empty? Half full? To the mathematician, the glass is [(pi)\*r(2)\*l] while the water is [(pi)\*r(2)\*l]/2, where r=inner radius of glass & l=inner height of glass. —Brant Matthew Tate'
quotes[378]='Half empty? Half full? To the architecture historian, the glass is not yet of interest. Once the water evaporates however.... —Brant Matthew Tate'
quotes[379]='Half empty? Half full? To the engineer, the glass is poorly designed. —Anonymous'
quotes[380]='Half empty? Half full? To the web designer, <P>the<B>glass</B>is<IMG SRC="images_number1/Optimist-01.gif" WIDTH="169" HEIGHT="28" ALIGN="MIDDLE" BORDER="0" NATURALSIZEFLAG="3">.</P> —Matthew Landrus '
quotes[381]='Half empty? Half full? To the glass, everything contains and is contained. —Bruno Santos '
quotes[382]='Half empty? Half full? To the dreamer...what glass? —Susi Knight'
quotes[383]='Fate is a foolish thing to take chances with. —Tonetti'
quotes[384]='The past does not repeat itself, but it rhymes. —Mark Twain'
quotes[385]='Give me a name for fate, and I am a fool! —Tonetti'
quotes[386]='Chances are, fate is foolish —Tonetti'
quotes[387]='Chance is the fool\'s name for fate. —Fred Astaire'
quotes[388]='Fate is the foolish thing, take a chance. —Tonetti'
quotes[389]='He that would make his own liberty secure must guard even his enemy from oppression; for if he violates this duty he establishes a precedent that will reach to himself. —Thomas Paine'
quotes[390]='Those who stand for nothing fall for anything.—Alexander Hamilton '
quotes[391]='Everything on the Internet devolves to free. —Mike Ellsworth'
quotes[392]='If it\'s not electric, it doesn\'t work.—Mike Ellsworth'
quotes[393]='Minnesotans are like salmon; they always return home to spawn.—Mike Ellsworth'
quotes[394]='If it\'s not on video, it didn\'t happen.—Mike Ellsworth'
quotes[395]='Once we assuage our conscience by calling something a \'necessary evil\', it begins to look more and more necessary and less and less evil.—Sydney J. Harris'
quotes[396]='When you can flatten entire cities at a whim, a tendency towards quiet reflection and seeing-things-from-the-other-fellow\'s-point-of-view is seldom necessary.—Terry Pratchet'
quotes[397]='Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn\'t go away.—Philip K. Dick'
quotes[398]='I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use.—Galileo Galilei'
quotes[399]='An error doesn\'t become a mistake until you refuse to correct it.—Orlando A. Battista'
quotes[400]='I have not failed. I\'ve just found 10,000 ways that won\'t work.—Thomas Alva Edison'
quotes[401]='All truth passes through three stages. First, it is ridiculed. Second, it is violently opposed. Third, it is accepted as being self-evident.—Arthur Schopenhauer'
quotes[402]='Knowledge speaks, but wisdom listens.—Jimi Hendrix'
quotes[403]='Yeah, but it\'ll come calling itself anti-fascist.—Huey Long (when asked if fascism could come to America)'
quotes[404]='I am not young enough to know everything.—Oscar Wilde'
quotes[405]='Pray, v.: To ask that the laws of the universe be annulled on behalf of a single petitioner confessedly unworthy.—Ambrose Bierce'
quotes[406]='Unfortunately, for many people, the devil you know is preferable to the angel you don\'t.—Mike Ellsworth'
quotes[407]='I don\'t even have an e-mail address. I have reached an age where my main purpose is not to receive messages.—Umberto Eco'
quotes[408]='There are two types of people in the world: Those who think there are two types of people in the world . . .—Mike Ellsworth'
quotes[409]='Microsoft thinks there are two types of people in the world: Microsoft employees and beta testers.—Mike Ellsworth'
quotes[410]='It may look like a crisis, but it\'s only the end of an illusion.—Jerry Weinberg '
quotes[411]='You cannot enlighten someone against their will.—Mike Ellsworth '
quotes[412]='Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.—Groucho Marx '
quotes[413]='A lie can make it halfway around the world before the truth even gets its boots on.—Charles Haddon Spurgeon'
quotes[414]='The pure and simple truth is rarely pure and never simple.—Oscar Wilde'
quotes[415]='You live and learn \- or you don\'t live long.—Robert Heinlein (as Lazarus Long) '
quotes[416]='First get your facts\; then you can distort them at your leisure.—Mark Twain'
quotes[417]='I never failed once. It just happened to be a 20001-step process.—Thomas A. Edison'
quotes[418]='The world is a dangerous place, not because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing.—Albert Einstein'
quotes[419]='Computers in the future may weigh no more than 1.5 tons.—Popular Mechanics, forecasting the relentless march of science, 1949'
quotes[420]='I think there is a world market for maybe five computers.—Thomas Watson, Chairman of IBM, 1943'
quotes[421]='I have traveled the length and breadth of this country and walked with the best people, and I can assure you that data processing is a fad that won\'t last out the year.—Editor in charge of business books for Prentice Hall, 1957'
quotes[422]='There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home.—Ken Olson, president, chairman and founder of Digital Equipment Corp., 1977'
quotes[423]='This \'telephone\' has too many shortcomings to be seriously considered as a means of communication. The device is inherently of no value to us.—Western Union internal memo, 1876'
quotes[424]='640K ought to be enough for anybody.—Bill Gates, 1981'
quotes[425]='Only the wisest and stupidest of men never change.—Confucius'
quotes[426]='If opportunity doesn\'t knock, build a door.—Milton Berle'
quotes[427]='If you have anything to tell me of importance, for God\'s sake begin at the end.—Sarah Jeanette Duncan'
quotes[428]='Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.—Thomas A. Edison'
quotes[429]='Quotation is a serviceable substitution for wit.—Oscar Wilde'
quotes[430]='Trying to take something off the Internet is like trying to take pee out of a pool.—Anon.'
quotes[431]='Never attribute to malice what can be adequately explained by stupidity.—John Richer, physicist and weapons designer, Los Alamos National Laboratory'
quotes[432]='When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much he\'d learned in 7 years.—Mark Twain'
quotes[433]='Do one thing every day that scares you.—Eleanor Roosevelt'
quotes[434]='No matter where you go, there you are.—Buckaroo Banzai'
quotes[435]='No matter where you are, there you go.—Buckaroo McCloud (as told to Mike Ellsworth)'
quotes[436]='Be who you are and say what you feel because the people who mind don\'t matter, and the people who matter don\'t mind.—Dr. Seuss'
quotes[437]='Freedom is not worth having if it does not include the freedom to make mistakes.—Mahatma Gandhi'
quotes[438]='It is amazing what you can accomplish if you do not care who gets the credit.—Harry Truman'
quotes[439]='No fate but what we make.—as seen on Sarah Conner\'s grave in T3'
quotes[440]='Civilization exists by geologic consent, subject to change without notice.—Will Durant'
quotes[441]='There is no greater demoralizing experience for mankind than unemployment.—Franklin Roosevelt'
quotes[442]='Striving for excellence motivates you; striving for perfection is demoralizing.—Harriet Braiker'
quotes[443]='To have a great idea, have a lot of them.—Thomas A. Edison'
quotes[444]='Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.—Thomas A. Edison'
quotes[445]='One useless man is a shame, two make a law firm, and three or more become a congress—Ben Franklin'
quotes[446]='Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.—attributed to Ben Franklin, though he never said it'
quotes[447]='I\'ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.—Michael Jordan'
var whichquote=Math.floor(Math.random()*(quotes.length))
document.write(quotes[whichquote])